The few friends I had among males were gay guys. I was chums with them and I was certainly not someone for them to lust after, because I just did not like men and did not like being male.
My gender identity was hopelessly female, but I didn't know what gender identity was back then. I only knew that I wanted with all my heart to be a woman.
So, I fell into the only thing that helped me get through the day: crossdressing. And I never dressed in a sexual way, I never went in for leather or any exotic sex fetishes.
I only dressed like a woman because I wanted to be one. I wore my hair long in the Eighties, so I did not have to wear wigs. I shaved my legs and sometimes my arms so I could appear more like a woman. I hated that my breasts were fake. However, in 25 years of crossdressing I managed to become adept at makeup and walking in heels and appearing feminine.
So, learning late in life that my gender identity was female made everything make sense.
Naturally, I hated being male because my identity was as a woman.
That's why the gender affirmation surgery I received in 2017 made me feel like a real person.
While it took about a year to get used to my new body and the effects of the hormones I was on, I eventually realized that I was a woman for real.
That's why, even though it took me so long to become a woman, I was completely, and in fact, a female. What a wonderful gift it was.
